Changes I made (actively or naturally) following the decision not to try to lose weight ever again

– Instead of taking fat-hate-talk personally, I come home and browse the fatosphere for a sane perspective.

– In fat acceptance, I have a new favorite topic to research or buy books about, a new “hobby” in fact.

– I have filled my twitter with fat accepting people, so that I might counteract my exposure to mainstream culture’s opinions with other views.

– Instead of participating in discussions around weight loss, dieting, and related food and exercise talk, I don’t respond and just wait for it to pass, or wait for a good opportunity for me to change the subject.  I guess the change is that I don’t feel obligated to participate just because a conversation is happening.

– I have become more aware of every little thing that gets said or done against fat, but I view it in a more anthropological way than an emotional away.  Of course, sometimes I get emotional about it, but in general my thinking about it has shifted to one that will probably be more productive for my life.

– I hardly ever read “health” articles, whereas in the past it was probably my most frequently-searched-for topic.

– In recent years, I never read mainstream women’s magazines much because I found them boring or depressing, but now I literally avoid them like they are diseased.

– I don’t watch weight loss reality shows anymore.  I also watch less tv in general so as to avoid commercials, and I will often mute weight-loss commercials.

– I have started feeling really positive towards fat people I meet or see (as opposed to judgmental).

– I hardly ever have a negative thought about some one else’s outfit.

– I don’t think about food nearly as much, and never in a guilt-ridden way.  I still think about food, because I love food and I love to cook, but the topic easily fades away when I’m not actively hungry or actively planning something food-related.

– I avoid looking at the “nutrition” information on packaged foods, looking only at the ingredients list if I’m interested.  I don’t compare “healthfulness” when deciding if I will buy something.

– I’ve stopped telling myself I have to exercise.  Occasionally I choose to, but it definitely happens more rarely.  I am extremely busy in my life right now, and I could see choosing to exercise more often if I had more free time overall (I like my exercise to be a peaceful part of a relaxing day, not an additional stressor).  Also, I may exercise more after I’ve been able to break down the link between exercise and dieting even more.

– I never don’t go somewhere because I don’t feel attractive (or thin) enough.  Being attractive is not criteria I use for myself for any activity.  This seems to have taken a lot of pressure out of “looking good”.

– I have bought clothes that look good on me and in general fit me better.  I haven’t put off buying clothes because I might change in size (though I might, since I am still recovering from a lifetime of disordered eating).  I haven’t only bought clothes that made me look thin.  I’ve gotten more strict about an item needing to be one I really like on me, but less strict about it “hiding my fat”.

– I have felt a new, sometimes subtle, level of isolation from most people because we no longer have this same major cultural belief.  It makes me wonder what other cultural issues our society has wrong.  What other common assumptions would sound strange to people 100s of years from now looking back on our time?

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2 Responses to Changes I made (actively or naturally) following the decision not to try to lose weight ever again

  1. Samantha C says:

    Great list! I hope it all gets easier as it goes on. Just to have some perspective and a safe place to rant can be so helpful – the majority of the reason I made my own blog was just to be able to vent and complain to people who would understand, and not have to worry about well-meaning accidentally-shaming comments. The funny thing is, even though I was really nervous to let my friends read my blog in case I was wrong about them, I’ve discovered that way more of my friends are fat-positive or coming around to it than I would have thought.

    The point about exercise being something relaxing instead of an additional stressor is really important, I think. If you want suggestions, I’ve been having a surprising amount of fun with Wii Sports and Wii Sports Resort. A round of virtual golf is deceptively calm and pleasant for how tired I am when I’m done, and the games can be very short if you want. (Though I’d stay away from Wii Fit – as many plus sides as it does have, the intense focus on BMI and weight-loss goals is a huge turn-off)

  2. fattery says:

    Thanks! I don’t think I’d have too much of a problem with my friends, but I guess I kind of like having a place that (for the moment) is anonymous so I don’t have to edit myself for anyone. That, and I’m scared about “coming out” as fat. I’ll probably have to at some point, though, just for my own sanity.

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